In line with the karma topic, I’m posting an e-mail that I got from Carroll a couple of years back that I stored in my inbox for years.

The 90/10 Principle

Discover the 90/10 Principle. It will change your life (at least the way you react to situations at work and at home…)

What is this principle? 10% of life is made up of what happens to you. 90% of life is decided by how you react. What does this mean? We really have no control over 10% of what happens to us. We cannot stop the car from breaking down. The plane be late arriving, which throws our whole schedule off. A driver may cut us off in traffic. We have no control over this 10%. The other 90% is different. You determine the other 90%. How? By your reaction. You cannot control a red light., but you can control your reaction. Don’t let people fool you; YOU can control how you react. Let’s use an example.

You are eating breakfast with your family. Your daughter knocks over a cup of coffee onto your business shirt. You have no control over what just happened. What happens next will be determined how you react. You curse. You harshly scold your daughter for knocking the cup over.

She breaks down in tears. After scolding her, you turn to your spouse and criticize her for placing the cup too close to the edge of the table. A short verbal battle follows. You storm upstairs and change your shirt. Back downstairs, you find your daughter has been too busy crying to finish breakfast and get ready for school. She misses the bus. Your spouse must leave immediately for work. You rush to the car and drive your daughter to school. Because you are late, you drive 40 miles an hour in a 30 mph speed limit. After a 15-minute delay and throwing $60 (traffic fine) away, you arrive at school. Your daughter runs into the building without saying goodbye. After arriving at the office 20 minutes late, you find you forgot your briefcase. Your day has started terrible. As it continues, it seems to get worse and worse. You look forward to coming home, When you arrive home, you find a small wedge in your relationship with your spouse and daug! hter. Why? Because of how you reacted in the morning. Why did you have a bad day?

A) Did the coffee cause it?

B) Did your daughter cause it?

C) Did the policeman cause it?

D) Did you cause it?

The answer is D. You had no control over what happened with the coffee. How you reacted in those 5 seconds is what caused your bad day. Here is what could have and should have happened.

Coffee splashes over you. Your daughter is about to cry. You gently say, “It’s ok honey, you just need to be more careful next time”. Grabbing a towel you rush upstairs. After grabbing a new shirt and your briefcase, you come back down in time to look through the window and see your child getting on the bus. She turns and waves. You and your spouse kiss before you go to work. You arrive 5 minutes early and cheerfully greet the staff. Your boss comments on how good the day you are having. Notice the difference? Two different scenarios. Both started the same. Both ended different. Why?

Because of how you REACTED. You really do not have any control over 10% of what happens. The other 90% was determined by your reaction. Here are some ways to apply the 90/10 principle.

If someone says something negative about you, don’t be a sponge. Let the attack roll off like water on glass. You don’t have to let the negative comment affect you! React properly and it will not ruin your day. A wrong reaction could result in losing a friend, being fired, getting stressed out etc.

How do you reach if someone cuts you off in traffic? Do you lose your temper? Pound on the steering wheel? (A friend of mine had the steering wheel fall off) Do you curse? Does your blood pressure skyrocket? Do you try and bump them? WHO CARES if you arrive ten seconds later at work? Why let the other motorists ruin your driving? Much more you day?

Remember the 90/10 principle, and do not worry about it.

You are told you lost your job. Why lose sleep and get irritated? It will work out. Use your worrying; energy and time into finding another job.

The plane is late; it is going to mangle your schedule for the day. Why take out your frustration on the flight attendant? She has no control over what is going on. Use your time to study, get to know the other passenger. Why get stressed out? It will just make things worse. Now you know the 90-10 principle. Apply it and you will be amazed at the results. You will lose nothing if you try it.

The 90-10 principle is incredible. Very few know and apply this principle. The result? Millions of people are suffering from undeserved stress, trials, problems and heartache. There never seem to be a success in life.

Bad days follow bad days. Terrible things seem to be constantly happening. There is constant stress, lack of joy, and broken relationships. Worry consumes time. Anger breaks friendships and life seems dreary and is not enjoyed to the fullest. Friends are lost. Life is a bore and often seems cruel. Does this describe you? If so, do not be discouraged. You can be different! Understand and apply the 90/10 principle. It will change your life.

Love is like war,

Easy to begin but hard to end.

~ by Anonymous ~

THE GREATEST ADVISES

Don’t date because you are desperate.

Don’t marry because you are miserable.

Don’t have kids because you think your genes are superior.

Don’t philander because you think you are irresistible.

Don’t associate with people you can’t trust.

Don’t cheat. Don’t lie. Don’t pretend.

Don’t dictate because you are smarter.

Don’t demand because you are stronger.

Don’t sleep around because you think you are old enough and know better.

Don’t hurt your kids because loving them is harder.

Don’t sell yourself, your family, or your ideals.

Don’t stagnate.

Don’t regress.

Don’t live in the past. Time can’t bring anything or anyone back.

Don’t put your life on hold for possibly Mr/Mrs Right.

Don’t throw your life away on absolutely Mr Wrong because your biological

clock is ticking.

Learn a new skill.

Find a new friend.

Start a new career.

Sometimes, there is no race to be won. Only a price to be paid for some of life’s more hasty decisions.

To terminate your loneliness, reach out to the homeless.

To feed your nurturing instincts, care for the needy.

To fulfill your parenting fantasies, get a puppy.

Don’t bring another life into this world for all the wrong reasons.

To make yourself happy, pursue your passions and be the best of what you can be.

Simplify your life. Take away the clutter.

Get rid of destructive elements: abusive friends, nasty habits, and

dangerous liaisons.

Don’t abandon your responsibilities but don’t overdose on duty.

Don’t live life recklessly without thought and feeling for your family.

Be true to yourself.

Don’t commit when you are not ready.

Don’t keep others waiting needlessly.

Go on that trip. Don’t postpone it.

Say those words. Don’t let the moment pass.

Do what you have to, even at society’s scorn.

Write poetry.

Love Deeply.

Walk barefoot.

Dance with wild abandon.

Cry at the movies.

Take care of yourself.

Don’t wait for someone to take care of you.

You light up your life.

You drive yourself to your destination.

No one completes you – except YOU.

It is true that life does not get easier with age. It only gets more challenging.

Don’t be afraid. Don’t lose your capacity to love.

Pursue your passions.

Live your dreams.

Don’t lose faith in your God.

Don’t grow old. Just grow YOU!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: